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You know you’re on the right track when you have to say and write is true to what you’ve believed.
It’s time that does it work for you. It will test how resilient and patient you are to make things work.
If you really meant that you wanted something, the universe will indeed give it to you when the right time comes for it.
I sent my previous post to my parents to read and they did reply, confirming what I wrote:
Make your peace now, if you haven’t done it already. It won’t happen immediately because it shouldn’t. All of us have ‘parent’ issues or ‘home’ issues. Many of us don’t know where home is. Home can be many things for us. It definitely is the heart. But this feeling is universal. And just because we can’t find our meaning of home, let’s not deny the possible creation of it that the people who gave birth to us have tried to make. They are equal products of the same society you comprise off.
I’ve always lived my life in death of my parent’s child. Always hoping I would be dead for them. But this is a lie we keep telling ourselves. We run and try to look for it elsewhere.
I’ve had many friends who have been losing their parents. I’ve always feared losing mine too as I’ve seen them struggle in their own health issues, being closed to giving themselves to death. I’ve seen my mom fall during her chemo and watch my dad weep against the wall cause as a man he isn’t allowed to do that. I was thankful that he let me hold him and comfort him that day when he had to bathe mom. I’ve seen my mom praying incessantly in tears while my dad was in surgery for his heart. She was unsure if she would be alone her entire life after if it wasn’t successful, but she couldn’t speak of it. I was grateful that despite the fact I wasn’t talking to them, circumstances brought me to their home where I could comfort and offer them security.
I’m sure my friends have had similar issues with their parents. There is no worse or better here. We are born in the families we have because we too asked for it. As much as our parents intended and manifested us, we have asked to be born to these folks and manifested ourselves with their help. This is the power of creation. We can’t blind it and think of creation as only the act of writing passionate poetry and making brilliant art. These are materials of our minds. As much as I call my paintings my babies or my perfect creations and I hold on to them in such value – I can understand what my parents have been meaning to say their whole lives to me.
Forgive and let go. There is no room on this planet for our egos to come between love. I have understood that love is universal. That it does heal, only if you are persistent in understanding when to use your ego while you still practice empathy towards all.